Friday, August 31, 2012



People who live with debilitating pain are my new heroes. In a display of psychic prowess, I correctly predicted in my last blog post that I'd be making a trip to the eye doctor fairly soon. That was last Sunday afternoon. I'd woken up that morning with a dull ache behind my eye which had preceded each of my last visits to the eye doctor. Typically it would start with redness and lead into the ache/light sensitivity by the next day. But this time there was no redness, just the ache, so I resigned myself to some mild discomfort for the rest of the day, knowing I would just be calling the doctor's office in the morning (just how I wanted to spend a day off huh?) Oh if I had only known.....

By 9pm the dull ache had begun to intensify so I decided to just go to bed and try to sleep through it. About midnight I woke to find my eye was just about swollen shut and the dull pain had increased to an overwhelming throb. The pressure was unlike anything I had experienced before - like quite possibly my eye was going to explode. After about an hour of trying to breathe through it, I finally woke hubby up. I was getting scared of how intense the pressure was. That and the fact that the moonlight coming in the window was causing excruciating pain, (I also had my sunglasses on....I kid you not), was beginning to concern me. We decided to call the after hours emergency number for my eye doctor. The doctor on call was extremely kind and offered to meet me at the office to administer some kind of pain meds, but warned that he would need me to come back as soon as the office opened to see the surgeon as it was clear this was no longer routine complications from the surgery back in January. I decided that I could forgo the pain meds as long as he could assure me I was doing no physical harm in waiting it out (he assured me I was not.) He promised he would be in touch after reaching the surgeon and arranging for him to meet us first thing. (Thank you Dr. Hurley for calling not once, but four more times and once to check on me after everything was said and done.)

I can do this...I thought. Just a couple of more hours and I'll have relief. I'll just lay down and close my eyes and I'll be able to fall asleep.... I'm so tired. Let me tell you, pain in the light of day with activity, sounds and whatnot going on around you is so different from silent, dark, dead of the night pain. There was nothing to distract me from the pain, nothing to make me think it would be over soon. The hours of night drag on endlessly when you have pain. I love night time and a good night's sleep ranks high on my list of must haves. Yet, I could see how quickly night could become your enemy when you have chronic pain. Hubby lay with me, rubbing my back, trying to ease the pain. He didn't speak, clearly knowing there was nothing he could say to make it go away. I just had to (literally) grit my teeth and bear it.

When the phone call came at 6:30am telling me what office to meet the surgeon at, I had reached the breaking point. I was shaking, drifting between chills and sweating; literally wanting to jump out of my skin. I have no shame in admitting that I finally just broke down crying out of sheer frustration. To have no relief from the pain was too much to take and in reality it hadn't even been 24 hours.....some people experience this for days, months on end? As I new heroes.

The rest of that day is really a blur. We had to drive to their alternate office (I have no idea how we got there or what the office looked like on the outside.) A series of exams followed by a meeting with the surgeon, who very quickly advised that we reverse the surgery from last January. My body, for whatever reason, was rejecting the implants. Each of the previous issues had been small warning signs. Since we weren't listening, it was going to turn things up. A heavy dose of oral steroids, antibiotic and steroid eye drops, a Valium and about 12 hours later, the surgery was reversed and the pain was gone. Hopefully I am now on the road to recovery. A few more weeks of steroids will tell the tale......

Physical pain can be an annoyance - daily debilitating pain is something else all together. It's mentally, physically and emotionally draining. To deal with that and try to lead a daily life, takes a particular kind of strength - a strength I'm not honestly sure I'd be able to exhibit. If you have someone in your life who deals with daily pain, have patience when they are struggling, offer support where you can and say a prayer that it be taken from them. 

~ Adrienne

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Where did summer go??

I'm not sure how this happened, but one day I wrote a blog post, went to bed, and woke up the next day to find that it was not in fact the next day. It was somehow 51 days later and there wasn't a blog post in sight. Speaking of sight, mine continues to be an issue (we are now on round 2 of 4 weeks of eye drops and something tells me that I will be making a trip to visit the eye doctor again.....very soon.) 

But for now, I am pretending that it feels fine and that it is not hindering my ability to sit at a computer for long periods of time.....

So here is a recap of what the last few weeks have entailed........

GARDENING - When last we spoke the pruning/planning/mulching had been completed. Despite the drought this summer brought, I've been able to keep our new plants alive. Not bad right?

 Hubby and I decided that we needed a mini getaway. Somewhere we could drive to (and by drive, not days), somewhere we had never been, and preferably that would involve seafood.

 Mystic, CT it was. 

Note - We did break up the trip by stopping the first night in Albany to visit my aunt and uncle, who surprised us with tickets to see Blue Man Group. Awesome musical talent and yes, as I pointed out to my aunt, we did just pay money to watch that man eat Captain Crunch on stage (hopefully someone has seen the show and will know what I am referring to.)

We arrived in Mystic the next day and spent a couple of days exploring a charming coastal town. Here's what we found:
  • Narrow roads with extremely friendly drivers
  • A draw bridge which is an event every 40 minutes
  • Great sunsets
  • A wonderful aquarium
  • Seafood Seafood Seafood (Angry that I forgot to take a picture of the lobster sandwich I had upon arrival....but I was mesmerized by the lobster....) 


 We returned to reality a few days later with some great memories and a new appreciation for the New England states.......

So, what else have we done you ask?

Friday night we took a trip back to our high school days. We took in the Def Leppard/Poison/Lita Ford show. Hubby's best friend and his fiance were with us as we took that trip down memory lane. Some observations from the night:
  • Why is it that I couldn't remember what I had for dinner the night before, but I could remember the words to a song that I hadn't heard in years?
  • Seeing Poison perform reminded me of their very first album - I remember hearing it when a friend brought it into our Catholic grade school class - so risque!
  • We did see a couple of people dressed in 80's rock and roll attire - leather pants, long hair, makeup (on the guys). I still haven't decided if they were just getting into the spirit of things for the night, or if they still reside in the 80's.
  • Brett Michael's mentioned Buffalo and Western NY so many times in their set that one could have made a drinking game out of it.
  • Lita Ford is 54 years old and has a new album out......go you.
  • Poison has been together 26 years.
  • Seeing hubby and his best friend playing air guitar like two teenagers was priceless.

So, what did your summer entail?

~ Adrienne

PS - Yes, I've continued working on my book - 14 chapters down......have no idea how many more to go. 

I've also added to the book collection through numerous rummage sales - just some light reading.